Man Food

I found this recipe a few years back, when I was pregnant with Jonah. The OB was taking hours to get around to seeing me, so while I waited, I flipped through one of the Cosmopolitan magazines on the table. Lo and behold, what should catch my eye but an article entitled, "How to Keep Your Man Interested." And listed among the twenty (mostly dubious) strategies was this recipe for the ultimate chocolate chip cookie. Since I'm always on the lookout for new ways to give myself diabetes, I copied it down on an envelope in my purse. It has served me well. Sigh. So here it is...

The Ultimate Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe
(with minor alterations)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Cream together:

• 1 cup butter-flavored Crisco
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1 cup brown sugar

Keep creaming until it's nice and fluffy!

Mix in:

• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 2 eggs

Sift together in another bowl:

• 1 1/2 cups flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon salt

Beat the flour mixture into the wet mixture.

Stir in:

• 2 cups oats

Once the oats are mixed in, add the good stuff:

• 12 oz. package (2 cups) semisweet chocolate chips

Now roll tablespoon-size balls, and drop those puppies on a parchment-lined baking sheet. (Or just use an Airbake sheet. I love Airbakes.)

Side note: Parchment saves on clean-up time, makes it easy to cool batches quickly, and can be re-used. Plus, it's cheap. Cheap is good.

Pop them in the oven for 10 to 12 minutes, and remove them when the tops are golden and cracking.

If you use parchment, just slip the whole batch off the sheet and onto the counter to cool. If you use a naked sheet, find a thin metal spatula, and transfer them to cooling racks within the first five minutes. Otherwise, the bottoms get thick and hard.

Serve warm, with a glass of cold milk, when he least expects it.


There you have it. If that doesn't keep your man interested, seek help.